BLACK OUT

Hi

Diary

“Life always is a path of ups and downs” These are the lines that I hear form everyone who wants to console you, or want to make you feel better because maybe these lines work or maybe not. It totally depends on the scenario. No, don’t worry I have not gotten into some spiritual stuff but I got the setback and sometimes these setbacks are enough to change the way you think

As we see people around, everyone experiences different types of reality, for somebody any incident could prove to be better and for someone it could prove to be the one ahead step of hell.

The same happened with me today. Remember my date with Vivan, maybe you can remember but I don’t want to.

After returning from the date, everything in my life got from better to best. I started seeing life with different perspective, I started believing more, trying to see world from his eyes. I thought that’s the best way to come out of depression.

Depression as the word people hear, everyone gives different reaction to it. For some it’s a serious type of disease that is contagious, for some its type of curiosity and they read on internet like buzzfeed article,7 ways to know that you are in depression but for everyone they create a soft corner in their heart.

Depression first of all is very different issue, it doesn’t relate that if you are quite you are in depression or if you are chatty then you are full of life and surly depression is not something that can be used for pity. What I had in me is something related to depression which made a more effect after meeting Vivan.

Days went by and so our talks, from good morning text to good night calls we talk about the smallest incident happened in a day or talk about the biggest issue of our life, It feels great that you can share everything what your heart feels without getting judged and without being cautious about what your mind and heart was thinking.

But does everything go the way that we planned, I guess in my case it never happened like what it supposed to be and the main reason to make my life happy was the same reason that made my life worst-Vivan

After few days of our first date we were not clear on our relationship status as for me I had in my mind that we are surly more than friends but for him he had something different in his mind.

We were normally video calling that night like we used to do and what he did was something that I can’t forget

“HI, you look beautiful “he said and again I blushed as I guess this thing gets to be his tagline every time

“Thank you “I said

“Can you guess where I am? “He asked me with enthusiasm

From what I was seeing in my cell phone screen was total darkness as even his face was the only thing I can see due to his cell phone light

“I don’t know, where are you?” I asked

Waiting for you, near your house so that we can talk about things having your favourite Choco vanilla with nuts on top ice-cream together “He said with that smile which I surly can’t resist

First of all, this felt to be great to have that impact in someone life that a person is doing that much for you so without giving a second thought I went out and yes obviously I have to lie to my parents to say that I am going to Shanaya’s place.

At last he was there with blue denim jeans and white shirt, looking like some high school student who is eager to get his best present, maybe he got his present what he was looking for but for me he proved to be the worst nightmare

“HI, where is my ice-cream? “I asked like a 5-year-old

“Why everything needs to be fast let’s drive to ice-cream parlour and then we can have a nice talk “He said with spark in his eyes

“Okay “I said, on one point my heart was thudding that something is not right but on the other hand maybe I was being too paranoid about this.

We drove in his car to the ice-cream parlour, in between I texted Shanaya about scenario so that she can cover for me if my parents would call for me

“Ladies first “He said and he opened the door for me

“Thank you” I said

Then we took our ice-cream and went inside the car. I had my concentration towards my ice cream and he had his concentration towards me. Everything was going well just like a normal average girl would dream of.

But then something weird happened, I felt his hand on my thighs. First I felt maybe he kept it by accident so it didn’t bother me, but his hand was not steady and was moving towards me and making its way towards my other leg. It gave me very different feeling that I am caught in some type of cage and will not be able to get out easily and I was freezing with fear.

“Umm, can you mind keeping your hands little bit towards the gear box “I said while shivering

“Don’t worry, every first time feel this way, I can make your first time be the amazing time “He said with smirk on his face and leant towards me to kiss me.

As I tried to do something to save myself he grabbed my hand and kissed me, due to lack of my pressure I was not able to defend myself and there I had my first kiss imposed on me.

“Maybe you are getting a wrong hint, we are not in relation as well and right now I don’t have anything like this in my mind “I said with trembling voice in a single hope that maybe I can save myself

“What is the problem with you girls, I have done everything to accept you the way you are even when you are fat, I talked about nonsense day and night with you, I took you out on a date, and when I need a simple thing from you, you can’t give “He screamed loudly at me.

“JUST GET OUT OF MY CAR, I DON’T NEED THIS TYPE OF GIRL WHO SAY NO TO ME “he screamed and pushed my head against the window by pulling my hair, due to pressure the glass broke and I got hurt at my forehead

I was trembling with fear, it took me at least a minute to figure out to open that car gate and as soon as I opened the gate, he pushed me out of the car and I fell down in one hand I got my phone on the other was pieces of glasses penetrating inside my palm, and at the here I was lying on the road and what I remember in the end was

“BLACKOUT”